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Endolphins

by endolphins

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1.
Drone 05:27
Now I'll save my own life again Scrub dishes one at a time Salt the water, walk away Watched pot proverbs in mind Break the brittle angel hair Over the foaming silver pot Turquoise strainer on the counter Jar of premade pasta sauce Eat while watching television Rebinge sitcoms from NBC we are all protagonists Fall asleep during alien 3 Wake up just to go to bed Rub my eyes rinse out the pot Netflix asks "are you still watching?" Three AM turn the lights off Getting pretty good at making weekdays go by Keep my head down, smoke a few, and watch time fly Might as well be watching the paint dry Might as well be watching the paint dry Before I know it, spring turns into fall Just Killing time between visits and calls All in all it's just another stall All in all it's just another stall Green tea on the greyest days Can't tell you what I did this week Golden bruised sunset healing Color palette mysteries Sunlight fills an empty room And hangs out there all day It's energy is more productive Than when I do the same Except for sticky bass line hooks At twelve I couldn't relate To all consuming apathy Living Longview by Green Day But this daily drone Still falls into meter A baseline grounded hum To fill out the rhythm cat flicks its tail Streetlights turn off The thumb presses The rubber button & the tv screen wakes up Invisible rhythms all around us, We snap to and quantize Like looking at a map of a city You’ve never been inside Imagining grids in north and south As horizontal 4/4 time The bus's route - a sampled loop Rush hour's tempo climbs the electric bill falls on the floor and doesn’t make a sound a cloud crawls across the sky But we stick around a cat flicks its tail
2.
ebbing, flowing mountain ranges waves of peaks, undulating static, massive rock formations from the highway, animated they roll and spread and decay like ripples in a lake but this time the dropped stone was me driving away toward the still water of home amorphous, leafy kudzu structures Seussian as a leech can muster soft and round parasite skin around the host, now skeleton the vines reach out and spread until the landscape is condensed into one cohesive form blanket over the dead like a sheet over a ghost tennessee dreams mountains made of smoke breathe the sound of green broken spirit phalanges the frequency of these wave formation hertz static buzzing cities slide guitars in the breeze a subtle sine of hills to grow on some tangent back up the road
3.
do you remember the flood? 2008, the river a lake our city covered in mud and everything destroyed my volkswagon passat and old innocent spots like it was all a ploy to push us down the river to learn to let go, move with the ebb and flow closure for beginners funny how such filthy water full of mud and debris, shit and disease is such a cleansing offer but the red bird said it ain't gonna rain it ain't gonna rain no more rained last night and the night before but it ain't gonna rain no more now its raining like it was back then the river was long, the snow tardy to thaw and we're all a little frightened but the sewer starts backing up water in the streets and overflowing creeks and the dam's almost had enough but a solitary voice calls out a long winged prophet in robes of scarlet with meteorologic clout but if its song of fortune is true the rain will cease, riverbanks retreat along with any chance to renew but the red bird said it ain't gonna rain it ain't gonna rain no more rained last night and the night before but it ain't gonna rain no more so bring on the rain bring on the flood bring on the roadblocks bring on the mud clean out our city clean out our past clean out our habits a cleanliness that lasts but when it rains it pours and its a monsoon or more like a bottomless vessel upturned on our castle but if it floods we'll roll up the rugs move the couch and weather it out there's cans in the cupboard candles, board games, and other things to do if we get bored until the clouds can't rain no more
4.
Grey Scale 04:04
god dammit i got stuck in grey while the world turned black and white somewhere in the gradient between pure and absent light stretched between two poles what are the rules we're living by, do we add or do we subtract? how do we know if its all or nothing when we look into black? can it be both sometimes? i don't much care for the winter's chill or the sweaty months when its all uphill i get bored with the sun overhead and i would at night if i wasn't in bed i prefer the subtle breezes of verdant spring and fall when the sun is at eye level at fleeting dusk and dawn give me that golden hour and fifty-nine degrees absolutes are boring, give me the in-between god dammit in the quest for balance i got stuck in a door frame both feet on different sides but neither holds the blame maybe there are hard lines but wait, maybe i can live among the studs and fiberglass build a bed of dust and drywall so i'll never have to ask aren't i still inside?
5.
worried now, won't be worried long worried now, won't be worried long Polarization Balkanization So complicated And opinionated Abrupt innovation Deep implications Progressive intentions Heated aggressions Worried now, won't be worried long Worried now, won't be worried long (Don't wanna worry, don't wanna worry) A just insurrection - An overcorrection Static and faceless - Easily hated Judgmental confinement - No realignment Idillic ambitions - salt in incisions So much information - Over-saturation Old conversations - In new rearrangements No clarification - all anticipation No inhibitions - All exposition Late on a payment - Red ink bank statements Your face in your fingers - Knowing dog whimpers Abdominal aching -Is it cancer or aging? Do you have insurance - Or enough high endurance? Your partner's "just tired" You shouldn't inquire Face in the pillow Weeping like a willow I swear I (won't be) Anxious and (worried) Even though it's hard with All that's going on (now) Please say you (won't be) Nervous and (worried) Everything ends and This won't last (long) Tomorrow (won't be) Absent, don't (worry) Watch the horizon you can Almost see the sun (now) Soon enough it (won't be) Normal to be (worried) We can be at ease again And maybe sleep all night (long) Trying not to (be worried) Always feels a little wrong But maybe we should (be worried) (Choppy samples) I'm holding out that this won't last too long Learning I really ain't that strong But Im finding hope in old forgotten songs Finding hope in old forgotten songs
6.
A Twitch 04:02
What could possibly satisfy The lingering twitch inside my eye That keeps popping up, tugging at my lids Not down to sleep but the side of my head Toward my ear Begging me to listen A nervous reminder I must have forgotten The string around my finger On so many things I have dropped the ball Erik's birthday I forgot to call A buried bill out of sight and mind But still pulling on my dominant eye Or Is it Just Typical anxiety Of things I could do better Nagging at me motherly For the things that I don't tell her But odds are that it's probably a vitamin deficiency It might be just misfired nerves A glitch in grey cerebral curves Or else chemical residue From all the drugs I've done and do Maybe then it's still a sign To shift habits and paradigms Stop wasting time I guess a twitch ain't an efficient Way to keep tabs what you meant I'd recommend paper and a pen Or an alarm on your phone set when You Might Need To remember

credits

released February 10, 2019

Alex Strong - Drums, synthesizer, vocals
Daniel Payne - Guitar, samples, vocals

Recorded, mixed, and mastered by Endolphins in Chicago, IL in 2019

Special thanks to Danielryan Balderascreek for support and critique.

Cover art and design by Daniel Payne

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